A Gay Dictionary (Page 1 of 1)

Oh boy. I am not really sure how to get into this subject or where to end the conversation. It is not as easy as the Queen of Hearts in Alice in Wonderland — I can’t simply “begin at the beginning and stop when I have reached the end.” I guess I will just start here.

Have you ever heard the term “gay” used in a phrase such as “That’s SO gay!” or “I’m not gay but my boyfriend is…” ?

What about the term “lesbian”? “Bisexual”? “Transgender”? “Intersex”?

Are you familiar with the alphabet spectrum: LGBTQIA?

OK, let’s start with Webster’s definitions (Step 1) and go from there. Pay close attention. I will most likely answer some questions that have been on your mind.

Gay: (see homosexual) of, relating to, or characterized by a tendency to direct sexual desire toward another of the same sex.

Lesbian: of or relating to homosexuality between females.

Bisexual: of, relating to, or characterized by a tendency to direct sexual desire toward both sexes. (*Of note: Webster’s also defines a bisexual as “possessing characters of both sexes / hermaphroditic” which is NOT a definition that I have heard in the community, but it makes sense)

Transgender: having personal characteristics (as transsexuality or transvestism) that transcend traditional gender boundaries and corresponding sexual norms.

Transsexual: a person who strongly identifies with the opposite sex and may seek to live as a member of this sex especially by undergoing surgery and hormone therapy to obtain the necessary physical appearance (as by changing the external sex organs).

Transvestite: a person and especially a male who adopts the dress and often the behavior typical of the opposite sex especially for purposes of emotional or sexual gratification.

Intersex: intermediate in sexual characters between a typical male and a typical female.

Pansexual: exhibiting or implying many forms of sexual expression.

Finally, the Q and A in the LGBTQIA spectrum are reserved for those who are Questioning their sexuality and Allies, or heterosexual individuals who are sensitive to the ins and outs of the gay community.

I failed to mention cross-dressers in these definitions. A cross-dresser is similar to a transvestite, but the label is self-chosen to reflect one’s desire to dress in the clothing assigned by society to the opposite gender. This label is most commonly applied to men because women often dress in jeans, pants or suits but men rarely wear dresses.

Step 2: Subcategories

Did you think that all gay men were Will Trumans and Jack McFarlands? Well guess again, honey. We are as diverse as any other population. I am certain that this is not an exhaustive listing, but here are a few of the subcategories I have rounded up for your entertainment.

In the Gay Men category,

a Bear is a larger framed and hairy gay guy;

a Cub is a younger, smaller hairy gay guy;

a Queen is much like Jack McFarland, flaming and animated, usually very high maintenance;

Twinks are the cute late-teen or early-20-somethings, usually with blond hair and Abercrombie bodies;

Chicken is reserved for the youngest gay boys, usually in their late teens;

(Radical) Faerie is a more specific term for a group of naturalist, often nudist gay men who are radical in their political and social agendas;

Troll is an unflattering term reserved for the older gay male who is always at the bar buying drinks for the Twinks and Chickens (No, Vincent, you are not old enough to be a Troll); and

Daddies are the older gay men in relationships with younger gay men. 

For Lesbians (I had to ask my friend Karen):

A Granola lesbian likes to take hikes and be one with nature;

Lipstick lesbians are very “femme” choosing dresses and makeup over flannel and denim; 

a Chapstick lesbian, like my friend Karen, may like sports and being active, she also likes T-shirts, flip-flops and visors;  

Dykes come in all forms, they might be bullish and butch or socially aware and feminist — even the most mainstream lesbian might refer to herself as a dyke;

Dykes in Spikes play softball;

Dykes on Bikes ride motorcycles and lead the Gay Pride parade every year; 

LUGs (Lesbians Until Graduation) well, we know what they do; and

L.I.T.s (Lesbians in Training) are out there, just like they sound.  

In the Trans category, there are Male-to-Female (MTF), Female-to-Male (FTM), S.O.s (Significant Others), GGs (Genetic Girls) and Admirers, among others. Significant Others usually, in my experience, are not transgendered but range in their sexuality and may be straight, gay, lesbian, bisexual or pansexual. Admirers are of most interest to me. The one Admirer that I met at a transgender conference was a heterosexual male who just showed up at the conference and was flirting with several of the transgender and cross-dressing ladies. Apparently he has a fetish. There are many more out there like him; the girls report seeing them at every conference.

I will close with this thought: The rainbow flag is an appropriate symbol for the GLBT or Queer community as we are a very diverse group. Unfortunately, lumping people together takes away some portion of their individuality and leads us to believe that they are all the same. Additionally, no category title works for everyone. Some are offended by the term Queer, others find it comfortable and easy and are working to reclaim it so that it can’t be used against us. Whatever it’s called, celebrate diversity! And don’t take my word for the categories in this article, go see for yourself. You will find many different, wonderful people with varying world views and stories. They are all fascinating!!

**Retraction: The photos in the last issue of Ranting and Raving were mistakenly credited. The photographer was Jim Clement Jr.